My Poor Wallet

This is what I looked like after my mechanic called and gave me the news…………

I’ll never by another Ford product again…..never ever never……ever never ever………….

Dirty Mind?

This week has been quite the roller coaster. However, I am feeling better about certain situations, so I truly believe I did the right thing.

Got go get ready for work, so I’m leaving you with, of course, a quiz.

Your Mind is NC-17 Rated

You’re mind is so filthy… you should should be washing every part of you out with soap. If your thoughts can go dirty, they do. Almost everything is NC-17 to you!

Do You Have a Dirty Mind?

I was actually a little shocked it didn’t come out X-rated !

Hope everyone has a great Friday. I’m leaving for my week long beach vacation in 6 short days. Yesterday my favorite Sister-In-Law was able to find a condo last minute in our building and talked the hubby into going. Bitch even told the owner a sob story and got her place $300 cheaper than mine, and I booked in March not the week before, sheeesh. Remind me to have her negotiate all my deals from now on. Anyway, it’s gonna be extra extra fun. Frozen bay breezes on the beach all day instead of working, sounds like heaven to me.

Until we meet again, Kids !!!!!

Inspired

The Road Less Traveled
by Kit McCallum

How often we must bear the challenges of life;

The endless roller coaster between happiness and sorrow;

The constant ups and downs of daily strife. And always the question remains …. why?

Life is not an easy road for most;

It twists and turns with many forks in the road,

Although always, and inevitably, we are given a choice …

Do we turn to the right … or the left?

Do we take the high road … or the low road?

Do we take the easy path … or the difficult one?

Decisions are not easy for those struggling for direction …

And sometimes the many choices and signs become overwhelming.

While standing at a crossroads in life,

The urge is to take the most comfortable path;

The road with least resistance …

The shortest or most traveled route.

And yet, if we’ve been down that comfortable road before;

Have gleaned its lessons in life, and learned from our experiences;

Do we yet again follow the known?

Or does our destiny lie in another direction?

The fear of the road less traveled is tangible and all too real;

It manifests itself in many ways,

And tends to cloud the issues that might otherwise be clear.

It is in these times of confusion,

That we must seek peace and solitude;

Time to contemplate on our life,

Our experiences and our choices past;

Time to look back, and reflect on what we have learned

Without fear or confusion.

For only each of us knows our own personal thoughts;

Our unique past and personal history;

The experiences that brought us to the crossroads we now face.

We can always learn a small degree from others experiences,

And yet … no one person can walk in our shoes,

Others know not, the trials and tribulations faced in private …

For each is individual … unique … and personal.

And that is why … while standing at a crossroads,

Only “we” can formulate the decision for ourselves;

The true direction that lies within;

The choices we must deliberate on with clarity and wisdom.

For it is only through personal reflection, That we can now choose our destiny;…

Our next adventure;… And the future we will embrace.

Codes, Knives, and Betrayal

The saga of the “Nekkid Picture” continues.

So as a birthday present to myself, I decided to confront “The One Who Got Away.” But being afraid of being charmed right out of my panties, I sent an email. Within 2 hours, I received two phone calls, but decided against returning them. The following morning, another call which I took.

I was so proud of myself, I kept my cool (somewhat). I got a little loud but I didn’t scream and yell, and the only insult I used was “fucking jerkoff.” However, I believe the tone of my voice probably could have whipped Mr. Universe into tears, so I definitely got my point across. Now this is where it gets sticky……………..

I was waiting for a dumb explanation of why he did it, and I didn’t get one. I simply got an an apology and admission of wrong doing. And I can tell you I believe it was sincere. And as you may have guessed by now, I still wanted the explanation of why. And here it is:

There is a certain code between guy friends/girl friends. The first and most important code of all is never ever ever fuck around with your friends current boyfriend or ex-boyfriend. Another part of that code is complete and total privacy. You should be able to tell this friend ANYTHING without having to worry about it getting blurted out to the world. You should be able to trust that whatever you say will stay between the two of you. In this case that did not happen.

The result of a betrayal of the code always results in a knife to the back.

Now we have three people whose friendship has been severely effected by this turn of events. Three people who have known each other for over 20 years. “The One” believes he has been stabbed in the back, “The Guy Friend” believes that “The One” will never found out he ratted him out, and “The Girl” feels that trust has been destroyed, embarrassed, humiliated, sad, crushed, like a whore, and disrespected. I feel like I was thrown in the trash, and have been feeling this way for weeks. I think I got the shitty end of that deal, and I wasn’t even there when the event took place. But then if you stick your hand in the fire too many times, eventually you’re gonna get burned, right?

So I only have myself to blame for sending the pic in the first place. If I had never sent it, it would have never been shared, and a friendship between two guys that have known each other since grade school wouldn’t have been ruined. So as I’m typing this the emotion of guilt is now crawling into my heart. I DON’T DO GUILT. I never feel guilty about anything I do. I always make sure I am 100% sure about what I’m doing. This guilt thing sucks. I feel like I have a rock in my belly. But don’t worry, that’ll pass, like I said – I don’t do guilt.

So here are my thoughts on the matter as it stands now……………I have accepted the “guy code” explanation, it doesn’t make what he did ok – but having an explanation is better than nothing. I’ve accepted the apology, but still feel raw about it. I still feel cheap, humiliated and all sorts of angry and hurt over it, but I’m hoping that I’ll be able to let it go soon. Now that I’ve dealt with that, I’m contemplating on whether or not telling me about this picture was done on purpose ? I am also contemplating whether or not I am perceived as a whore by “The Guy Friend.” I can not figure out why someone who had no interest before – suddenly thinks it’s ok to make his intentions of getting me into the sack known. Did he honestly think I would say, “Oh, you saw my picture – ok – lets get it on.” Ummmmmmmm…..NOPE. So, if “my friend” thinks I’m easy, cheap, and easily bedable – is he really as good of a friend as I originally thought? I’ve learned a lot about him and the things that went on while I was off getting married and having babies and didn’t hang around anymore.

So there you have it………….three stabbings took place. I was stabbed in my back by “The One” when he treated me like a prostitute, “The One” was stabbed in his back by a so-called best friend leaking “guy coded secrets” (and from what I understand, it’s not the first time), then “The Guy Friend” being stabbed in the back by me telling “The One” I knew what he did.

Wow, that’s a lot of knifing going on in my part of this shitty ass world. And the only thing that makes me feel better about it, is that I got it out and had my say. So it had to be done.

But now I’m furious with the both of them. I can’t classify someone as a “Best Guy Friend” who thinks I’m some kind of slut who will get all flattered by compliments regarding a naked picture he should have never seen. And now that I think about it, What the fuck – why would you even tell me you saw it ? I’m starting to think that he knew that if he told me I would be livid at “The One.” He probably assumed I would never talk to him again. He assumed wrong……see if I have a problem, I don’t solve it by simply not ever speaking to someone again. I am known for not speaking to someone right after an altercation, but I do always have my say eventually. I confront you first and then make my decision of whether or not your worthy of my conversation. So he had to have known I would eventually split into two and give “The One” H E double hockey sticks for disgracing me the way he did. He knows me – and knows how I react to things. Maybe he didn’t realize how hurt I’d be by it, or maybe he knew I would be devastated and thought I just might sleep with him and then he could throw it in “The One’s” face. He thought wrong. What he managed to do was destroy trust that I had for the both of them.

If you would have asked me “Who do you think would always come to your rescue if you needed help?” Of course, my Boomer is at the top of the list, but these two would have been right up there with him. Now, I’m not so sure I would even feel comfortable asking. In this whole situation, I did get fucked…..just not in a good way. Sorry to say, I’m still very hurt, well more like crushed and I wish I could make the both of them feel the way I did and still do.

I think my heart might be broken a little. See, I know all of you who read my stuff all the time think I have a big heart, but you don’t know me in the real world. Due to the abusive relationship I have spent so many years in, I firmly believed that my heart was already in pieces, so how in the hell could someone else do any more damage. I prided myself in being cold when it came to feeling for another person. I WAS VERY WRONG.

Apparently you can still break off pieces of a broken heart. Because yes, my heart is full of pain right now – and it shouldn’t be.

Please don’t feel sorry for me, I’m not out for pity. I guess it’s a good thing that I can still feel like a normal human being. I’m going to see how this plays out and hopefully I’ll be able to put it behind me and put my trust back into the one person in this world I “thought” would always be there when I needed him. Only time will tell I guess.

Peace out Peeps – Needed to get that one out. Sorry so long – it was a torrid tale of woe !

COP ON A SEGWAY

Today while making my long long trip to work on foot (car STILL in the shop), I noticed one of Philadelphia’s finest chatting up a storm with a homeless man in a wheelchair and a bike courier, and get this …… on a Segway.

Now before I start this rant, I would like to add this disclaimer: The author of this post has complete and total respect for the men in blue, so please do not take this post as a slam on our Officers. Oh, dude in the picture, I’m not talking about you. You just look like the Officer spotted today. No offense mister.

Here we go:

In Philadelphia today, you cannot wake up and listen to the news without hearing about some kind of money problems with City Hall and the State of Pennsylvania. Gun crime is completely out of control, we have a Mayor who has his freaking head up his ass, and an aging District Attorney who has lost her ummmpphhh………. We also have a faltering Department of Human Services Division and many many many homeless.

And what does the City do…….they put fat, out of shape, couldn’t run down my mother if they tried, cops on Segways !!!! Do know how much Segways cost !! And do you really think any criminal is gonna get caught by a cop chasing him on a Segway???????

I’m am completely outraged. This city plans to lay off workers who have families to support and lives to live, and your outfitting our police officers with unnecessary forms of ridiculous transportation. Is it because the officer was out of shape ???? Because I fully expect a cop that is paid by my taxes, to be able to catch a crook on foot if necessary. Not some big gushy man who can’t even bend over to tie his own shoes.

My solution to this problem, I DON’T EVER WANT TO SEE A COP SMILING AND YUCKING IT UP WITH THE PUBLIC ON HIS BRAND NEW SEGWAY – AND INSTEAD OF PATROLLING THE PARK HE IS SHOWING OFF HIS NEW TOY. THAT’S NOT WHAT YOUR PAID FOR BUDDY. YOU WEREN’T AROUND WHEN THE CRAZY GUY STARTING YELLING AND SPLASHING PEOPLE WALKING BY WHILE JUMPING AROUND IN THE FOUNTAIN. YOU WERE TOO BUSY BEING COOL.

Good God, I just wanted to knock his little bike helmet right off his head. What happened to the cops on bikes in Center City? Now those guys could compete in a foot chase and would win. Not to mention most of the bike cops are HOTTTT !!!

And that’s all I have to say about that.

Hope everyone is having a great hump day. I got lots of stuff in the works, so I gotta run. Stay cool, have fun, and get your hump on.

Love:

If you could read my mind..

Oh the tale my thoughts would tell.

So yesterday, I had a selfish moment. I kind of lost control of myself and wrote “the old boyfriend who showed the best guy friend a nekkid picture of me” an email. I contemplated calling and telling him off, but he’s a charmer, so I thought it best I just say what I had to say and move on. Then I get a voice mail – “call me tomorrow and we’ll work this out” !!!!!

Ok, first of all, I didn’t do anything wrong (besides giving him a picture), so why should I have to call him ? And what the fuck does he think we are gonna work out ? That one kind of baffled me. How can you work out disrespect ? How you can you work out how cheap and embarrassed it made me feel ? I’m not sure that can be done. I would like to see him try, just so I can watch him suffer, but I highly doubt it would be successful. Especially with someone as stubbornly Irish as me. But like I said he’s “the one that got away” so, I’ll hear what he has to say before I tear him apart (*evil smile*). If he even calls.

So now I have the dilemma of do I come clean with the “best guy friend” and tell him that I lost it. Remember I promised him I wouldn’t say anything because he’ll lose sidework because of it. But I’m sorry, I was hurting over it and had to get what I had to say out. It wasn’t fair that I walked around sick about it for weeks. Every time the scenario of them too looking at that picture popped into my head, I felt physically ill. I shouldn’t have made a promise I knew I couldn’t keep. And now I feel guilty about it. But one lie doesn’t justify another, so should I keep it from him? Help me out kids….I’m torn.

Thanks everyone for your b-day wishes throughout the weekend and yesterday. It really meant a lot to me. I got these flowers from a friend of mine…..Phillies colors……..Dude is an amazing person with such a big heart …… And yes dear, I will remember that it’s just a number.

Hope everyone has a fantabulous Tuesday. I gotta go get some work done !

Love:

My Birthday with My Kids :-)

Priceless !!!!

36 Years Young

I’m not afraid to admit it…..Today I am 36 years young…….So, I’m giving myself the day off….See you all tomorrow.

Dinner and KY Jelly – Don't Try and Guess, Just Read.

Happy Sunday !

This morning I have two topics…..what I did last night and a product review. It’s kinda long, but stick with me.

First is where I went to have my B-day dinner last night. It’s called the City Tavern. Although I like going there, It’s not one of my all time favs. The one thing I like about it is that the place is full of history. The Tavern has been there since the 1700s and it was one of George Washington’s favorite places to congregate. The waiters and waitress all dress in colonial clothes and you eat by candlelight. Well I’ll let you click the link and read all about it. Since the asshole was treating I ordered a 1995 Beringer Blush wine and drank the whole stinking bottle. Yes, I was sick this morning. It would be one of the reasons why this post is taking place at 5 am on a Sunday when I should be in bed sleeping in. Anyway, each of the early Presidents have their own beer, and I have to tell ya, Thomas Jefferson’s Tavern Ale was the best. Hamilton’s tasted like perfume and Washington’s Porter was just too dark. But it comes on a really cool paddle that I think they give you just in case the kids get out of hand.

After dinner we walked around Old City…What a beautiful night, even the gusts of wind where enjoyable. At one point, The Boy and I were almost blown down the street.

Then traveling home, I wanted to know why Walnut Street always had traffic, no matter what time of the day it is…….

So being me and a little tipsy, I leaned my head out the Van and asked a Dude that looks like this…”Excuse, but is this traffic always here ? Does it ever go away ?

His reply, “Give me a dollar and I’ll tell Ya” – No shit, a damn dollar just to answer the question. At that point, The Asshole rolled my window up. And that’s what I get for talking to dirty strangers who have no homes and are drunk on whiskey all day.

Anyhoo, I thought it was an interesting evening. Then I discovered this………….And things got a little bit more, well lets say, intense.

Now I’ve been wanting to get this for awhile now. I never believe the hype on products like these. But it was on sale so I figured what the hell. And you know what …. I HIGHLY RECOMMEND IT. Ok, now how do I explain this without offending any conservative types out there. The purple is for her and the blue is for him. Her lube has a cool menthol feeling – his is a warming/gets hot jelly – and when you mix the two !! It’s quite interesting. Now I didn’t feel like the TA DA !!!!!! they make you think your gonna get on the commercials, but it was definitely awesome and the orgasm, I swear it felt like it lasted at least 3 minutes. Granted I only got one, but that one was WOW !!!!! I had to recover afterward. So buy it or not, but I can tell you it’s not a waste of money. A little pricey, but WAY WORTH IT.

Well I’m gonna run. It’s now 6 am and I’m thinking maybe I’ll try to go back to bed. Hope all of you are having a great weekend. Today it’s pool time, bbq time, and devils food cake time….Yummy…my favorite.

Later Kids..

Love,

A Post This Dumb Doesn't Have A Title

What a wonderful feeling not working on a Saturday ! I’m hitting the pool – anyone know what the weather is gonna be like today?

I’ve been thinking about my week in review and ya know what, it wasn’t all that exciting, well, with the exception of getting a present in the mail…I love presents… but here we go:

1. Got sick on Tuesday and took a much need day off. I swear I slept 16 hours.
2. Car got sick and had to go into the car hospital yesterday – right before vacation…..UGH
3. Thursday a birthday present arrived in the mail at work and I promised my friend I would not open it until Monday. It’s freaking killing me. Talking to me from the desk drawer saying OPENNNNN ME ! It’s been highly stressful.
4. Big Boss came back from vacation and found out about a system crash and loss of billable time and wanted to speak with me immediately ! Can you say heart attack, I was the one logged in when the files “disappeared”. Turns out, he’s on my side 🙂 He’s trying to get rid of the program I was using now when “IT” happened because I hate it.
5. I found another bottle of rum in my basement. He was so drunk he forgot to hide it. Started a 2 day war.
6. I’ve decided that the “evil blogger” is no longer evil, just thrown under the bus.
7. My Mom and Dad celebrated 44 years together and she called me laughing hysterically when she received the flowers I sent her and read the card, which said “Dear Mom and Dad, Congrats on all these years of being together without killing one another. Love “R”, “D”, and Kids. Ha! I crack myself up.
8. At this time next Saturday, I’ll be on my way to Ocean City Maryland to begin a week long vacation at a beach front condo…….it’s killing me.

So there we go. Eight significant things this week. I know boring right. But I had to post something in order to get my fix which is my blog addiction. I have to catch up on everyone this weekend. No time to read at work and the asshole is always hovering around like a fly over shit when I’m at home.

So I’ll be lurking at all different hours of the day to get caught up with you guys.

So, I’m gonna run and play some Texas Hold Em on Facebook. I was so hot at the poker tables last night at Oscar’s that I got the fever and can’t stop playing. By the way Oscar, we took in so much dough last night that I planned a get away to Costa Rica for September for just the two of us 😉

Have a Happy Saturday Kids ! I’m gonna go find a tree to sit under and just chill, while the boy swims his little heart out – Ahhhhh, I love summertime. Some one get me a lemonade.

Love: